Abandonment Kills

The Effects Of Abandonment

Abandoning a person is murdering them. One will hate the person who abandoned them when one reaches their limit, endless possibilities of destruction are inevitable. It is dangerous and heinous when they are abandoned because created is self-hatred and also hatred against the one who left. There are no boundaries for hatred, therefore death would not be uncalled for. Ultimately, the abandoned one will evolve into a time-bomb awaiting detonation. One is tremendously affected by abandonment because one is psychologically, mentally, emotionally, and physically damaged.

When a child grows up without psychological or physical attention, it equals abandonment. According to Black, “physical abandonment occurs when the physical conditions necessary for thriving have been replaced by lack of appropriate supervision, inadequate provision of nutrition and meals, inadequate clothing, house, heat, or shelter, and physical or and/or sexual abuse”(1). The children's caretakers are whom the children depend on. When the children are neglected nurture needed to mature stably, it refrains them from the ability to trust anyone and subsequently,  develop fear. Black articulates emotional abandonment is “when a child has to hide a part of who he or she is in order to be accepted or not to be rejected.”  and parents need to provide proper emotional environment for “healthy development” (1). Abandonment shames the child and the pain caused can heal only if the emotional injuries are accepted, otherwise “the pain will stay with them, becoming a driving force in their adult lives” (3).

Jacob Ind, an abandoned child who eventually murdered his stepfather and his mother did not surprise me. Ind and his older brother were sexually and physically abused by their stepfather, as well as emotionally ignored by their mother. Ind told FRONTLINE that the most damaging part was the “emotional battering he suffered from his mother” (1). Ind was going to commit suicide after the murder of his parents but police apprehended him before he had the chance. Given the knowledge about Ind’s living situation, it is justifiable to say his actions were in response to the horrible situation at home. He was physically abandoned by his stepfather and psychologically abandoned by his own mother. Ind felt as if he had no other option; he was physically and sexually abused, which lead to emotional breakdown and in the end his mother abandoned him making him feel worthless and shameful. He became mentally unstable, abandoned, hurt, and “saw no way out” (FRONTLINE 1). His parents’ job were to protect and love their children but all they did was cause their own deaths. Ind was sentenced to solitary confinement where he is yet again abandoned, but this time by the entire world. 

The subject of abandonment is heavy and all types of abandonment is abuse. One type of abuse connects to others. For the aforementioned reasons, there is no doubt abandonment is dangerous and is advised not be ignored. The pain of abandonment cannot be healed by a child or an adult alone. The grief they experience is overwhelming and causes mental instability. It is becoming a global issue to ensure that abandonment is abolished. Abandoning a child is a bloodcurdling thing to do; the child becomes hateful, shameful, and who knows what else can happen when their time bomb trigger detonates.
Works CitedBlack, Claudia. "Understanding the Pain of Abandonment." Psychology Today. Sussex Publishers, 4 June 2010. Web. 5 Apr. 2015. <https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-many-faces-addiction/201006/understanding-the-pain-abandonment>."When Kids Get Life: Jacob Ind." ed. PBS. FRONTLINE, 8 May 2007. Web. 1 Apr. 2015. <http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/whenkidsgetlife/five/ind.html>.

-Lilia