Fear of Abandonment or Lack of Maturity - The Effects on Me

Fear of Abandonment or Lack of Maturity?


Recently, I have come to realize that I may have fear of abandonment. It is not yet classified as a "phobia" but as a complex psychological phenomenon. I realized I don't like to be alone or left behind (eg. walking). This is going to impact me when I am attending University of California Los Angeles. I don't like to being home alone or walking by myself.  I know, it sounds absurd but this is how I am. But how serious can this be?

It could be that I can cling to those surrounding me or the fact that being lonely is a horrifying idea. This is inevitable and will affect me in long term. I will become an independent adult attending a reputable university and this is plain immaturity. I feel forgotten, isolated, neglected when I am by myself which is ludicrous. I don't think this is a disorder or such; I just need to learn to grow up.

story of my life

My parents contribute to this madness. They have sheltered me so much that I cannot even do much by myself. I am neither independent nor capable of doing things that others my age already do. I cannot cook, do laundry, drive, swim, and bike.

always

It was not long ago that I had an epiphany that I was not competent at much. School did little or nothing to help this. My peers around me would be talking about driving and working; I would sit to the side and just feel kind of left out. 

So scratch that, I do not have fear of abandonment. Yeah, immaturity is good for the soul sometimes but shouldn't actually become a lifestyle. I only lack maturity. I apologize for being bombastic early on.  In conclusion, putting me in a self-dependent environment aka college will cause personality development. I am eager to see what college has in store for me!

happy holidays :)



-Lilia

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